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5/23/2019 2 Comments

​How to Rest & Unwind

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With our lives being as busy as they are - long to-do lists, overflowing in boxes/baskets, and never-ending repetitive tasks - how many of us feel comfortable taking time to rest? 

Personally this is a huge struggle for me. As I always feel I have courses to update, classes to plan, a business to market, and articles to write, I usually debate with myself on whether I can afford to take a nap, or simply sit and just enjoy a cup of tea.  My habit is to force myself to keep going despite being fatigued in mind and body.

Years of perpetuating this habit has revealed its futility:
  • Denying ourselves much-needed rest is detrimental to ourselves, those around us and our jobs.
  • When we are running on empty, we are less efficient and effective at whatever we do, and, even worse, we are less patient, flexible, and resilient. 
  • Thinking that we’ll rest when all our work is complete is unrealistic.    
 
What is Rest?
True rest and relaxation means completely being at ease without planning or striving, feeling pressure, or worrying about what needs to be done.  Resting or simply doing nothing heals our overall being.

For those whose racing mind won’t let you put up your feet when your inbox is full, Psychologist Rick Hanson urges reflecting on your beliefs or fears about resting.  Some common mental and emotional obstacles to rest are:
  • we’ll disappoint others,
  • the job won’t get done,
  • we’ll look like a failure,
  • we’ll lose our edge and not be as competitive. 

To undermine the mindset that associates rest with failing, ask yourself:  What am I afraid of?  Whose approval am I seeking?  Does being busy make me feel useful? Does a busy routine really keep me on top? Am I really useless when I take time off?

The benefits of relaxing or napping I can speak of personally.  I’ve noticed after a nap, I wake up refreshed with a clear mind, energized, optimistic, and confident that I can cope with my work load, and be ready to face whatever comes my way.
 
Ways to Rest:
  1. For some time each day, give up social media and your phone.  Playing electronic  games isn’t restful because your mind is still working.
  2. Take a nap (my favorite rest technique).
  3. Do something creative.
  4. Before napping or going to sleep for the night, give yourself permission by saying to yourself, “I’m going to rest now”.  To get myself into this habit, I stuck a post-it note with these words on my head board. 
  5. Take a few minutes each day to use your senses in an intentional way:  notice colors, feel the warmth of the sun on your skin, smell the coffee or flowers, savor the taste of your food, lie on the grass or ground and feel its grounding, centering energy.
  6. Meditate on your breath in your belly to calm your mind and separate from your thoughts.
  7. When you finish a task, take a few minutes' break to reflect on your achievement and celebrate it before continuing with the next task.
  8. Each day sit quietly doing nothing with mindful awareness noticing all that is happening inside and outside of yourself. 
  9. Review your work load and consider carefully before taking on new commitments. 
 
Try resting at least 5 minutes every day. But if you don't do so, be gentle with yourself as the simplest way to unwind is to practice self-compassion.   When our minds are peaceful we feel rested.

May your rest heal your mind, emotions, and body.

2 Comments
Masei Shirkhodaei
5/24/2019 16:38:16

This is a hot topic for me as I’m always tired and feel short of time. I’ve always placed everyone else’s needs prior mine and noticed that I’m always complaining that I’m not taking care of me....I came to the conclusion that if I don’t make time for me than no one else will either.

Reply
Casey
5/28/2019 10:36:01

Hi Masei
Sorry for the late response. Just back from retreat!
You are so right that we have to be the ones to prioritize our own well-being and care. You know we can only truly take care of others when we ourselves are cared for.
I celebrate your mindfulness awareness of the ways in which you contribute to your own exhaustion. Awareness is the first step to positive change. Well done and thank you for sharing.
What activities are you doing when you do make time to rest?

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