Balanced Mind: Happy Life, Happy World

Conflict is rising throughout the world.

Our beliefs about people with whom we disagree cause us to easily distrust and dismiss them. In the heat of passion, these beliefs can appear completely rational, solid, and unchanging. 

We may overlook the fact that as little children, we didn’t see others as different from ourselves; we didn’t see us and them.  And even as adults, in spite of our ideological leanings, most of us will wince when we see a fellow being in pain.  This instinctive response points to our shared humanity and deep-rooted connection.

We are changeable beings.

The current state of world affairs demands that we now reconnect to our fundamental human nature of being open, and having a balanced mind in our relationships with each other.

The benefits of being equanimous are: you will be happier and more peaceful;  your relationships will be more harmonious; you will be healthier and more resilient in stressful situations. 

When each person lives from this empowered peaceful part of his or herself, we will live in a world with greater goodwill in our relationships.

The following contemplation is especially effective in uncovering unconscious belief patterns that influence our interactions.  
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CONTEMPLATION:

• Breathe away tension and begin to relax.
• Bring to mind 3 people: a liked person, a neutral person, and an irritating/hated person.
• Observe your feelings when you think about these people.  Simply notice and recognize what’s arising. 
• Ask yourself: why do I feel differently towards these 3 people?
• Consider the liked person.  Is it true that this friend has always been good to me? Will this person always be of help to me? Think, there was a time this friend was a stranger, and, as it happens, one day you may lose touch.
• Consider the disliked person.  What about this person makes me think of them as my enemy? Has this person always only ever harmed me? Think there was a time this enemy was my friend and before that a stranger.
• Consider the neutral person.  What about this person makes me overlook them?  Why don’t I consider him/her a friend or enemy? Think one day this person could easily be my enemy or friend.
• Pay special attention to the shifting, changing nature of these relationships.
• All these views pivot off our liking, indifference, and disliking the people.  Our reaction is based on the “liked” person helps and encourages, the “neutral” person neither helps nor harms, and the “disliked” person harms us or our family.

This meditation clarifies the circumstantial and constantly changing nature of our relationships, showing the fluid transition of friends to enemies, strangers to friends, and enemies to friends.  Most importantly, it reminds us that our emotions influence our perspective, and that it is only in our minds that they are permanently friend, stranger, or enemy, for e.g. your enemy is someone else's best friend, your friend is a stranger to someone else and so on.

We are multifaceted and fluid beings who can respond to changing circumstances.  The story of Christian Piccolino who transformed from a Neo Nazi to befriending Blacks exemplifies this kind of radical change.  His story gives us hope for a healthier happier world.

 As we come out of the election campaign and enter the holiday season, when you are next interacting with any of these people, keep in mind the takeaways from your reflection.

May our balanced thinking honor the dignity of each being and connect us to our own humanity.

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